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I am only as proportionate as my rituals allow me to be. Listening to the same songs, following the habits that compose my sanity, succumbing to the desires that fuel my footsteps – both mourning and exalting the previous in order to accept the future. We are creatures of curious, comfort-seeking habit. We need familiarity while we plan our advances. This time of year I feel life flow in and out of me in rapid succession. I reflect like fucking crazy but come out strong and married to the resolution of a new year. The cold snap does both bury and ignite me.
I am attentive to the light as it is most commonly fleeting these days. My day job is on a hill that overlooks town. Precisely at quarter to four does the sun (without hesitation) dip between the hills and bathe the streets in a final emblem of amber coalescence. At this point in the day I watch our gilded reality settle in, eager to observe, however nauseated I am from hot, unending, undesirable company coffee.
The darkness begins to skirt, and guarded, I let go of our sixteen degree day in exchange for a subzero night. Stepping outside my lungs instantly blush, replete with ice-fringed oxygen and refrigerated air. In the copious cold I expel prompt rigidity – softened only by the thought of a heart-beating in the kitchen – two wild masses of fur, teeth, tongues, and paws – and another human I share both my nausea and excitement with. Softened only by the thought of an ever-swelling pot of soup, an expressway of enlightenment to my furrowed buckled, winter-laden bones.
This pot of soup is the business. Yes, squash can be easily overplayed this time of year (although its seasonality can’t be beat) – but I’m a believer that we must embrace its golden innards in all forms. Butternut is beautiful for all its worth – you are rich with one of these on hand. I hope you don’t find it cheating of me to turn it so quickly into soup – but to this I find it both an elixir and a beacon on the darkest and shortest of winter days. ps – you can use apple soup stock for this and immerse yourself completely. pps – sorry not sorry for caramelizing everything lately – the winter made me do it.
- 6 shallots, peeled and halved
- ½ tbsp olive oil
- ⅔ cup cream
- 1 tsp lemon juice
- 1 tsp dijon mustard
- salt and pepper
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Toss shallots with olive oil on a large sheet pan and roast 30–40 minutes, until tender and browned. Cool.
- Combine shallots with coconut milk (or cream), lemon juice, dijon mustard, and a pinch of salt and pepper.
- 1½ tbsp olive oil
- 1 cup coarsely chopped onion
- 1 cup chopped carrot
- 1 cup chopped celery and leaves
- 1 large garlic clove, smashed
- ¼ cup packed sage, chopped fine (+ more for topping)
- 2 lb butternut squash (1 medium), peeled and cubed
- ¼ cup white wine
- 4 cups vegetable broth
- ½ tsp cardamom
- ½ tsp white pepper
- 1 can cannellini beans, drained and rinsed
- ¼ cup apple cider vinegar
- In a large stock pot heat the olive oil. saute onion, carrot, celery, garlic and sage over medium-high heat until onions are translucent and vegetables have softened and are tender — about 7 minutes.
- Add butternut squash, toss, and cook for 3 minutes. add white wine and cook until mostly evaporated. add vegetable broth, cardamom, white pepper, and cannellini beans. Bring mixture to a boil, reduce heat and simmer uncovered 10–25 minutes — until squash is completely tender.
- Puree soup, in batches if needed, until smooth. add apple cider vinegar and bring soup back up to temperature. Thin with extra broth or water if need be.
- Serve topped with chopped sage and shallot cream.
I can’t stop it with the butternut and acorn squash soups in my kitchen, either. I think the addition of white beans here is just perfect. Our garden is covered with about three inches of snow right now. I’m hoping that the last, lingering sage leaves are still holding on. I’ll miss having those fresh herbs at the ready. 🙁
Jayme, thank you – and I also share the same sentiments. My heart seems to retract a little once the garden is covered beyond recognition – a silent ache for available bounty – but I keep it happy with plans for the next season. I, too, have some lonely sage I should gather – thank you for the reminder. Stay warm love. xo
The coming of the cold can bring out the best and the worst in us for sure. But this, the carmelizing and always soup, well that’s certainly the best and what will lead us home, no apologies needed. The color of the soup radiates the warm summer days that brought the squash to your table, perfect.
Jean – and the older I get the more I realize that I must worship whatever it is that brings me home. My darkened edges on a roasting pan and pot of golden, sweet and savory elixir is another man’s fireplace – yes? Thank you for your kind and loving words always.
I’m definitely a fan of all the caramelization that’s been happening …. winter just begs for those types of flavors!
As am I, Sarah! And yes, that is a perfect way of putting it – winter does indeed beg a celebration of all matters roast and simmer. Admittedly I think these may be my favorite ways to cook. xo
You do what you need to do to get by. That means all of the soup so you do that. I love white/navy beans and I can eat them as mush with hot sauce. I’m pretty strange but to use them in this soup is a step up. I’ll be sure to try it when I cut open the butternut squash I have.
I do have days where I am focused solely on getting by, and yes, sweetest woman – I think soup is often the sung/unsung solution. It keeps my skin thick and my heart open. I have to agree about the white beans, I would eat them on the moon – not to mention with hot sauce sounds fantastic. In soup? They are the best thickening agent, simultaneously offering a creamy consistency really nice for blended ventures. All my love. xo
i will not fault you one bit for turning that beautiful butternut into soup, nor caramelizing everything that falls into your hands these days. the winter, i agree, buries and ignites. i love those words. reflection seems commonplace for me as well, yet then i get upset with myself for feeling like i never do the things i set out to do. but maybe it’s just my outlook. all the love, and warmth on these chilly northern days. xo